Cartoon Characters in ‘Night Before Christmas’ Parody

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By: E&P Staff

A “Night Before Christmas” parody featuring numerous references to syndicated comics was posted today on The Comics Curmudgeon blog.

Some sample stanzas:

— “Mrs. Claus had been mixing Welbutrin with booze/And gone shopping with Cathy for undersized shoes/’It?s pathetic,’ cried Santa, with quivering lip/’Like I?m stuck in some damn ‘Funky Winkerbean’ strip.'”

— “‘What the hell,’ muttered Santa, ‘these problems are chronic/I may as well cheer myself up with the comics’/But before he could read ‘Mallard Fillmore’ and rage/All the comic-strip characters jumped off the page!”

— “‘Many thanks for your help — now I?ll be on my way/With these comic-strip animals pulling the sleigh! On Sherman, on Garfield, on Ginormous Frog –/On Marmaduke (my, isn?t HE a big dog)!”

— “A six-pack of Pabst and a bucket of popcorn/For Hagar, Ed Crankshaft and sad Leroy Lockhorn/(Along with Walt Wallet, not one is a baby,/They are nearing the end: do you think that they may be

“Rewarded in Heaven for excellent jobs,/With Pogo, ‘The Far Side,’ and Calvin and Hobbes –/Or consigned to the nethermost Circle of Hell,/Down with Billy, Jeff, Dolly, Bil, P.J. and Thel?)”

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