Predictions for the 'News' Year

By: Joe Strupp The New Year inevitably brings countless wrapups and predictions. Adding to the pile, here are a few from E&P that could, likely won't, but just might, be worth noticing if they occur in 2005 in the strange, but always buzzworthy newspaper biz.

1. The Tribune Company, in a continuing effort to cut costs, will take its budget-slashing ways beyond its newspapers to the Chicago Cubs, where it will offer buyouts to top players, reduce the size of Wrigley Field hot dogs by 20%, and seek a joint operating agreement with the cross-town White Sox.

2. In an effort to bounce back from its circulation scandal, Newsday will require every person who buys a copy of the paper -- subscription or single-copy -- to fill out an annoying registration form similar to those used on many newspaper Web sites proving that they did in fact purchase the copy.

3. A new reality TV show will debut, with this concept: A newspaper editor tries to figure out each week which of his reporters is making up stories (for example, by pretending to be in Maryland but actually reporting from his apartment). Starring as the Donald Trump figure: Howell Raines. Tagline: "You're a Liar!" Name of show: "Son of Jayson. "

4. Robert Novak will go to jail in the CIA/Plame scandal while Judith Miller of The New York Times will be sentenced to find WMD in Iraq, or else.

5. In a break with past practice, and to deny E&P its annual scoop, the Pulitzer Prizes will not only reveal the identities of finalists in each category prior to the choice of winners, but will disqualify The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, and Los Angeles Times, allowing only smaller papers without staff-heavy multi-part series to enter. The new slogan for the prizes: "Size Doesn't Matter."

6. President Bush will begin a tradition of holding weekly press conferences, allowing questions to continue until all reporters, including Helen Thomas, have asked at least one, and finally explain that bulge in his back.

7. Frank Blethen, publisher of The Seattle Times, will agree to give up his drawn-out effort at ending his paper's JOA with the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, sell the paper to Hearst, and start a new career as an executive with the Newspaper Guild.

8. Ann Coulter will drop her column after her syndicate, Universal Press, refuses to dump Ted Rall, "Doonesbury," and "Boondocks."

9. The New York Post will finally turn a profit after it ends its numerous gossip columns and puts the savings toward an ombudsman, expanded culture section, and redesign as a broadsheet.

10. Seeking to boost slumping attendance figures for the last few years, the American Society of Newspaper Editors' annual conference in April will be moved to Hawaii.